Ekev 5774 - English

By Rabbi Daniela Szuster,
B´nei Israel Congregation - Costa Rica

“You too must befriend the stranger, for you were strangers in the land of Egypt.” (Devarim 10:19).

“At last the great egg burst. "Pip! pip!" said the little one, and crept forth. He was so big and ugly. The Duck looked at him.  "It's a very large Duckling," said she. "None of the others looks like that…  But the poor Duckling who had crept last out of the egg, and looked so ugly, was bitten and pushed and made fun of, as much by the ducks as by the chickens…  So it went on the first day; and then it grew worse and worse. The poor Duckling was hunted about by everyone; even his brothers and sisters were quite angry with him, and said, "If the cat would only catch you, you ugly creature!" And the ducks bit him, and the chickens beat him, and the girl who had to feed the poultry kicked at him with her foot…”

You probably realized that these paragraphs are part of the classical children’s story “The Ugly Duckling”.  Why was this duck so ugly?  By the end of the story, we discover that he wasn’t ugly, but it was just the way in which the other animals, his environment, perceived him.

Why did they consider him “ugly”?  Aren’t swans extremely elegant and beautiful animals?  Simply, because he was different from all the others.

Not only did the chickens and other farm animals consider him ugly, foreign, strange, but also his mother and siblings.  He was a duckling that didn’t fulfill the rules expected by the family; he was different from his brothers and sisters, bigger and grayer than the others. These differences were reason enough to make fun of him and push him away.

Just some small differences and he was forced to leave, to search for other creatures that would accept him.  In that search, the duckling found that he was not ugly, but rather from another species; he was a swan and not a common duck.  What is sad is that he could only get comfortable, happy and content living with animals just like himself.  They accepted him, because he was a “fellow being.”

 This classical children’s story reflects a very common and cruel reality that we human beings experience.  Sometimes we are so insensitive and stubborn that we are unable to respect the differences.  We believe ourselves to be norm, and anyone different to be a deviation from the norm.  Throughout the history of humankind, the great wars started, among other things, for not knowing how to respect differences, for not being able to see with benevolence those who are different from me.

I’m sure that we can all imagine the suffering of that duckling.  All of us, at some point and at some place, have felt different, peculiar, strange.  And perhaps we were maliciously made to feel that way.

In like manner, consciously or unconsciously, we make others feel the same when we perceive them as different from us.

Along these lines, this week’s parashah tells us: “Veabtem et haguer ki guerim eitem beretz mitzrayim”, “You too must befriend the stranger, for you were strangers in the land of Egypt” (Devarim 10:19).  The Torah orders us to love the stranger, those who are different. It does not tell us to put up with them, to “bear” them, to respect them, but nothing less than to love them.  What a difficult request!  Only by loving them, being sensitive to their character, putting ourselves in their shoes, understanding them, will we be able to not discriminate against them.

The reason it gives us for loving them is interesting, for we as well, at some time or other, were strangers.  And because of this, by our being Jewish, different, not fitting with the ideal of non-Jewish society, we were hated throughout generations.  Without going too far, in these wearisome days we are again feeling the same contempt, both in Israel and in other parts of the world.  Our having experienced the pain and suffering resulting from being alienated, along with our feelings of isolation and vulnerability, gives us the ability to deeply understand what others are feeling, when they go through a similar experience. 

The Torah does not aim to the rational, to logic, but rather to the emotional dimension, which we cannot forget.  Remembering our past of discrimination can help us to genuinely love our fellow men and women.

Notwithstanding the progress and different declarations of human rights, we continue to live in societies that discriminate, that mock those who are different in any way, be it in their religion, culture, sex, generation, gender, color, etc., perceiving them as “ugly” only because they are different.  According to the Torah, the challenge lies in being able to love them, to celebrate diversity and enrich ourselves through those differences.

In the words of a poem entitled “Foreigners,” written by the Mexican poet Jose Emilio Pacheco:

“If they bother you for their accent or clothes,

for the strange words they use to call

what you name with different terms,

take a trip

not to another country

(it is not actually necessary)

but to the closest town.

You will see that you too are a foreigner.

May God help us to be more sensitive and understanding, and not so cruel and rigid in our thinking.  May we love those who are different from us, and enrich ourselves precisely from those differences.  They humiliated us when we were strangers; let us not do the same with our fellow human beings.  Instead of mocking them or despising them, we should celebrate the great diversity that exists among human beings.

May God grant that in these complicated times, both us and the entire world can raise up high the banners of mutual respect, love, and peace; and may differences become a source of mutual growth and coexistence, and a reason to celebrate.

Shabbat Shalom!